memorial day

This holiday weekend please remember that the reason you are enjoying a hot dog, a drink, and a day off work is because a soldier lost his life serving this wonderful country we call home. Please take a moment to remember the fallen, those they left behind, those who continue to serve, and the families who miss them everyday. Gone, but NEVER forgotten ♥

http://www.gazette.net/stories/05262010/montnew191317_32547.php

remember this memorial day: its the SOLDIER, not the reporter, who has given us the freedom of the press. its the SOLDIER, not the poet, who has given us the freedom of speech. its the SOLDIER, not the politician, who ensures our right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. its the SOLDIER who salutes the flag, who serves beneath the flag, and whose coffin is draped by the flag.

happy day!

congratulations to the bishop watterson high school class of 2010!!! especially my brother david!! ♥

(god i feel so old, one brother just graduated, the other will be a senior next year...guess i better start looking for gray hairs and get my AARP membership XD lol)

this is going to be a bitchfest. youve been warned.

i hate people who come in 5 minutes before closing and order smoothies and shakes. they take forever to make and its a pain in the ass.

i hate people who dont clean up after themselves. dont leave napkins and empty paper ice cream bowls on the table, we are not the kind of restaurant that has bussers.

i hate kids who fold their money up into something the size of a french fry. unfold your damn money so i can keep the line moving quickly.

i hate people who give me their order and then shove their money in my face. does it look like the register is in front of me?!

im kind of ashamed to say i work at graeters. i mean its a part-time job at an ice cream parlor, and im almost 24. its like, what am i doing with my life? i mean yes, i didnt work for a year. yes, this was the first/only job i could get right away after we moved back. but still.....at times i wish DH was back in the army and i could go back to being a housewife. im comfortable in that role, and there was absolutely no shame in saying that my job was to support my soldier. in fact, the pride i felt at times was absolutely overwhelming. i miss that.

sometimes i get really insecure and i feel like im "that friend," the one thats always around but that people just kind of put up with. i have no idea why. it doesnt happen so much with the friends ive known since grade school (although it does happen every once in a while), but it happens a lot with "newer" friends. like at the skybus reunion last weekend, i was genuinely surprised at how many people told me they were thrilled that i was back in the state and that we have to hang out sometime. and they were drunk off their asses, so you know they were being honest XD i think thats why i love the board so much; theres no real interaction, its all online. so theres no awkward lull in conversation in which i feel really out of place. but yea, no idea why i feel this way, i mean i dont think i have a reason to; i mean i like to think im a pretty likable person. sigh.

i hate that im so lazy. i have so many problems with the way i look, but zero motivation to actually get up and do something about it. id rather sit on the couch reading or watching tv than get up and do a workout dvd or something. but i have a bridesmaids dress to fit into in july thats a size too small, so i better get to it.

i hate worrying about money. like that song says, "i wanna be a billionaire, so freaking bad." probably 90% of our problems would be solved if we just had more money.

ummm i think thats all for now. id apologize for whining to yall, but this is my blog and ill whine if i want to :) lol

sunday randomness

so i had a dream last night that i was back working at skybus, working a flight with like 6 other people. we were in the middle of giving the safety demo, taxiing out, and this guy gets up and starts running around drunk and belligerent. we tell him to sit down and calm down or we will have to turn the plane around. so he doesnt stop, i call up to the pilots and have them turn around and go back to the gate, where the FAA escorts him off the plane in handcuffs. then mitch picks me up and we drive home, only home was my parents house, which was actually the playboy mansion. hes sitting in the dining room and im in the kitchen, and all of a sudden his ex-fiancee jen shows up and starts discussing very intimate details of her sex life. i tell her that she better stop fucking talking about sex with my husband and she gives me this look like who the fuck do you think you are? so i punch her in the face XD and have security escort her out.

yea...weirdddddddddddd. i mean i completely understand where the first part came from; the skybus reunion was last night (SO much fun!!), we all did a drunken safety demo, and one of the guys got drunk off his ass and the manager took his keys. but the jen part...yea NO idea where that came from lol.

i made an awesome breakfast this morning - cheesy scrambled eggs, free-range pepper bacon from the farmers market, and blackberry streusel muffins. soooooooo good!!

we got our new tv today!! cj is setting up the tv stand right now - its huge and there are so many parts and its just a pain in the ass lol. the old tv has been moved to the master bedroom, where i am currently watching the jersey shore marathon XD

uuuuuuuuugh

i am just not feelin it today. i am so unbelievably tired. i feel like i havent sat down for more than 5 minutes at a time in like a week. ive worked every single day this week so far, and im just not used to that anymore and its wearing me out. ive been sleeping in til like 10 every day and i hate it. i have too much to do. i set my alarm for 830 this morning so i could get up and shower and go grocery shopping but i ended up sleeping in til 945. grocery shopping is finally done, now i have to run out to babies r us and get a baby shower gift. then working again tonight since i picked up a friends shift. its a short shift, but still. then tomorrow is the marathon day - wake up at 0700, go to farmers market, go to baby shower at 11, go to whole foods and buy whatever i couldnt find at farmers market, try and clean a little bit, go to skybus reunion at 630 and get blissfully shitfaced. dont get me wrong, im excited for the baby shower and the reunion, but if i could get like 3 weeks sleep between now and tomorrow id be a much happier brenda. thank god i have sundays off. i plan on relaxing...and by relaxing i mean consuming an entire bottle of wine. and possibly some of the mikes hard black cherry lemonade i found at krogers today. ill clean a little bit, and i want to spend some time baking. i wanna make english muffin bread, strawberry banana bread, and blueberry muffins. well, maybe ill hold off on the muffins til next weekend. uuugh i just looked out the window and its raining again...i hate going out when its raining. maybe ill stop at barnes&noble and treat myself :)

shopping!

i love buying bellydance stuff ^_^ today i bought a choli and a hip scarf.



this is the hip scarf i bought, except i got mine in white.


i am getting so excited for Tribal Rev next month!!!!!

i just cant be with you like this anymore..........alejandro

despite waking up with the migraine that i went to bed with, im in a pretty good mood. i went to pochis with jackie, christine, dustin and brian last night. i had so much fun; it is SOOO indescribably good to be back around my old friends again. i mean i knew i missed everyone when i was in NC, but i dont think i realized just *how* much. so yay friends!

despite my aversion to twitter and high cell phone bills, i REALLY want a blackberry lol. i was at verizon yesterday transferring all my info into my replacement phone and i couldnt stop looking at the blackberry curve. its just so pretty!! but yes i feel like if i get a blackberry then i just have to get a twitter account, and i would die a little inside lol. but theyre so pretty.....my MIL addiction would be taken to a whole new level XD but im gonna talk to mitch about it, wait a few months and see what my paychecks are gonna be like, and then if we feel like we can afford the extra $30 a month on my phone bill then i think im gonna get one :)

i just realized yesterday that we are halfway through may. i mean i knew this already, but i realized that this means Tribal Rev is NEXT MONTH. and VERY SOON. im so freaking nervous about it. i mean dont get me wrong, i am superexcited, but i feel SO unprepared. i thought id be taking lessons right now, but we just cant afford it. so im gonna be so behind...i mean i cant even do a simple belly roll yet :( but, the tickets are nonrefundable and anyway i cant pass up the opportunity to study under not only ariellah, but also unmata. thats just too amazing of an opportunity to pass up.
which reminds me, i really need to book a hotel room. good thing i thought of this today, as today is the last day to book under the block of rooms they reserved at a discounted rate!

so i think when i go grocery shopping, im going to buy the stuff i need to make a few loaves of whole grain bread. im determined to start eating healthier and organic. and im just not convinced that the potato bread that mitch loves is really all that good for me lol. so ill buy some whole wheat flor, and some sunflower seeds and flax seeds and stuff to toss in there. maybe ill make sunday a baking day :)

since its getting warmer, my playlist has changed. whats on yours?
britney spears - 3
christina aguilera - not myself tonight
cobra starship - good girls go bad
ke$ha - tik tok
lady gaga - bad romance, alejandro, lovegame
nelly furtado - promiscuous
nil karaibrahimgil - seviyorum sevmiyorum
shakira - she wolf

irrational freakout time...

so i was talking to one of my co-workers, E, yesterday. she was asking me if my ex's name started with a J, and i said yea his name is J****, why? she told me she was talking to a friend a few days ago and her friend was like "how do you know brenda?" i guess she saw it on facebook or something. but anyway yea this girl is dating J, or as i will refer to him from here on out, assface. so yea, Es friend is dating assface. that in itself doesnt bother me, im not petty enough to be jealous or whatever that hes in a relationship. but it gets better. i guess this girl awhile ago was dating their professor? (she and assface met in class) and she got pregnant. the prof told her to have an abortion but she refused, and i guess like the whole class turned on her, saying she wanted to make him lose his job or whatever. so i guess assface stuck by her side through all of it, through the entire pregnancy, now theyre dating. the baby is a month old and now i guess assface is thinking about adopting it?! since he was there with her through the entire thing.

first of all, i hope and pray that he treats her a hell of a lot better than he did me. although with his track record, i highly doubt it.

second of all, i know i have zero say in it, but under NO circumstances do i want him to adopt that child!! once he gets bored with this girl, hell leave her and where will that leave the child?! that baby deserves better. i mean i know it all sounds honorable and noble on the surface, but believe me when i say there is nothing honorable about that "man."

third.....i dont like that hes been telling her about me. i dont like it at all. i mean i understand, people tell their significant others about their past relationships. but i dont even want him to speak my name. i mean how else would she have known who i was when she saw me on Es facebook? hes told her about me, and i do not like it. but im willing to bet he hasnt told her the truth about our relationship. how many girls would stay with a guy if he told her he had sexually abused his exgirlfriend? she deserves to know the truth.

and to top it all off, E told me that the girl looks a lot like me. i think that, more than anything, gets to me. it disturbs me, actually, and im not entirely sure why. it just creeps me out that his new girlfriend looks like me.

i found her on facebook.....im trying to talk myself out of sending her a message and telling her the truth about our relationship; i know thats probably just gonna open up a whole can of drama llama. she deserves to know the truth. im just so worried for her, i dont want her to suffer like i did. and im worried for her baby too, being around him. the whole thing makes me sick. i want to tell her to run, and to run fast and not look back.

save the life of kiana firouz

how is this not all over the news?!

from coilhouse.net:

Kiana Firouz, 27 years old, is an outspoken Iranian LGBT rights activist, filmmaker, and actress. When clips of her video documentary work featuring the struggle and persecution of gays and lesbians in her country were acquired by Iranian intelligence, agents began to follow Firouz around Tehran, harassing and intimidating her. She fled for England where she could safely continue her work and studies.

She plays a starring role in Cul de Sac, a documentary film produced in the UK about the condition of lesbians in Iran, and based heavily on Firouz’s own life story. Directed by Ramin Goudarzi-Nejad and Mahshad Torkan, the movie will premiere in London in a few days. Since the trailer was posted on YouTube in December 2009, Cul de Sac has attracted global media attention, with thousands of views. Apparently, some of those views included members of Ahmadinejad’s puppet media in Iran. They know who Firouz is and what she stands for. They want her to come back to the country she was born in to answer for it.

Firouz, understandably, has requested asylum from the British government. Much to everyone’s shock and dismay, the British Home Office has rejected her application for refugee status. Yes, they know she’s gay. Yes, they know she could deported back to Iran at any time, and that if this happens, Firouz will most likely be sentenced to torture and death after being found guilty of the “unspeakable sin of homosexuality” because she has participated in explicit lesbian sex scenes in the movie, and been a fierce proponent for human rights in her country.

In Iran, the punishment for lesbianism involving mature consenting women consists of 100 lashes. This punishment can be applied up to three times. After a fourth violation of Iranian law, a woman convicted of “unrepentant homosexuality” is finally executed by hanging, often publicly, in front of a howling mob.

From EveryOne Group:

Kiana filed for a court appeal following the Home Office’s decision to reject her application for asylum, but the judge overruled her appeal. According to Kiana’s lawyer, the last remaining chance is to appeal the judge’s decision, but the risk of deportation is imminent.

The EveryOne Group, an international human rights organization, which was involved in the asylum cases of the lesbian Pegah Emambakhsh, who risked being deported from London to Tehran in 2007, and of the Iranian gay, Mehdi Kazemi, appeals to the British government and the democratic forces of the European Union, the U.N. High Commissioner for Refugees, Antonio Guterres, that Kiana Firouz be immediately guaranteed adequate humanitarian protection and that the order for her deportation be repealed, given that on return to Iran she will face a death sentence not only because a lesbian but because of her civil rights activism.

The EveryOne activists invite concerned readers to send protest e-mail messages to the British Home Office (public.enquiries@homeoffice.gsi.gov.uk) requesting that Kiana receive refugee status as soon as possible, for she is a symbol of the international fight against homophobia and repression of gays and lesbians in Islamic countries.

I’ve spent a fair amount of my day researching, fact-checking and verifying this story, and I can’t figure it out: why is this news not EVERYWHERE right now? Why is this petition for Firouz so anemic? There should be hundreds of thousands of names on that list.

And yet, I am only just catching wind of Firouz’s story from a chance visit to Kim Vermillion’s blog, where Kim posted a heartbreaking letter written by an Italian friend of hers, Sylvia K. An excerpt:

No major newspaper even remotely talks about Kiana’s story, nor do gay activists. People don’t seem to care much at all. I do. Last night I wrote to Kiana. Nothing much, only to say that I was so saddened and angry, that her story had moved and inspired me and that I was SO thankful to her for standing up for what she truly believed in… This morning before going out I found her reply. It goes like this :

“Dear Sylvia
I am proud of you. we should proud of each other for being strong. I am so thankful for your supportive and kindly letter. It does not matter what is going to happen to me. Its all about freedom.
Take care and do not forget you are not alone, we are many…
Kiana”

I wrote it on a piece of paper and hurried out of the house.

I spent the greater part of this rainy day sitting in one of the University’s courtyards, crying alone [...] I look at myself, always complaining about homophobia in Italy, about the fact we have no equal rights, and I feel like a fucking piece of shit. Because for me, it is SO easy to go to London, to Paris, to Berlin and be the butchest fiercest lesbian around, without having to be afraid of being lashed 100, 200, 300 times and then hung, a thick rope around my neck, people rejoicing all around.

It does matter what happens to Kiana Firouz. This should not be a reality for her, or anyone else.

Here is the official Cul de Sac website.

Here is the petition endorsed by Kiana Firouz herself.

And this is her story.

Let’s make some noise, comrades.

please yall, sign the petition. this is abhorrent and an injustice in the truest sense.

my husband, my hero

it occurs to me that i dont brag about DH (dear husband) on here nearly enough. which is a shame, considering what an amazing man he is. for the last day and a half i have been unpleasantly sick, and hes done a wonderful job taking care of me. he rubs my back whenever i ask, he makes me sammiches, he brings me juice, hes pretty much waited on me hand and foot. he even watched a little bit of twilight with me o.O i feel like ive been such a burden, but he just gives me a kiss and tells me im being silly ♥ hes so wonderful.

i love my husband ♥

if i could...

if you had unlimited time/money/space/patience/whatever, what would would you do?

if i could, i would...

get regular manicures. i think i would feel so much more put together/prettier all the time if i had fakes for some reason...whether or not i had showered on any given day XD
buy coach purses, jimmy choo shoes and l.a.m.b. clothes
buy all our groceries at a local farmers market
whatever i cant find at farmers markets, id buy at whole foods
bake all our bread
make all our jam/jelly and tomato sauce
probably even make all our cheese (which apparently isnt as hard to do as you would think)
make a beautiful black and white wedding ring quilt
tend a moderately-sized garden full of beautiful vegetables and herbs
take up candle-making
buy every single book and dvd weve ever wanted lol
spend my weekends collecting shells on the beach somewhere in new england
attend all of ariellahs and rachel brices bellydance workshops and classes, no matter what state/country theyre in
start a rescue shelter for cats (and probably end up adopting all of them XD )
own my own photography studio, specializing in newborns and babies

support local businesses, and get discounts! :)

so yesterday i was at house wine in old worthington (i adore that place btw, and if you havent been yet well, what are you waiting for?!) and this little green and black card at the cash register caught my eye. it was a discount card for the Small Business Beanstalk. according to their website, they are:

...a local-first company that leverages connections of all types to support business and community growth. We use problem solving, networking, and relationship-building techniques to grow small businesses through a unique combination of matchmaking and concierge services.

The SBB also connects local retail businesses to our Neighbors, a broad base of active consumers from all throughout the Columbus community. The SBB makes this easier with The SBB card, which provides discounts at independent retailers, restaurants and bars in neighborhoods throughout central Ohio.

We believe there is real, fiscal value when local businesses support other local businesses and when consumers shop local.

pretty much they encourage you to shop locally and support small local businesses. the discount card is accepted at a ton of places throughout columbus. the full list is on their website and their facebook page, but heres just a sampling:

Black Olive (15% off any purchase - excluding alcohol)

Oxygen Health & Fitness ($10 off monthly membership)

Hounddogs Pizza (20% off all food before 4:00 p.m., dine-in only M-F)

The Candle Lab (20% off)

Elli Nail Spa (5% off all services)

House Wine (15% off Enomatic Card for their wine vending machine)

Worthington Inn (15% off all food - excluding alcohol)

PromoWest (LC, Newport, etc.) (2 bonus tickets with every new Decibel Club membership & FREE entry to special events TBA)

like i said, this is just a small sampling of the places you can use your discount. i signed up for my card at house wine, but you can do it online or, im assuming, at any of the participating locations. its totally free. discounts for supporting local business? yes please! :)

just call me caroline ingalls

im turning out to be much more domestic than i EVER thought i would be!!!

most of yall already know i bake obsessively, and i love to cook. ideally i plan on never buying spaghetti sauce again, because it is SO easy and fun to make! and tastes about a million times better. if i could, id never buy bread again either, id bake my own. i want to have a big garden full of fruits and veggies and herbs - nevermind the fact that im really not sure if i have a green thumb XD i already know how to knit; and now, despite the fact that my sewing skills are limited to patching up small holes in clothing, i find myself really wanting to make a quilt! and not just any quilt - a wedding ring quilt. which is apparently ridiculously hard. (mine would be white with black rings). i have no idea why i all of a sudden want to do this, that thought just came totally out of the blue! lol

i feel so old-fashioned, and i kind of like it :)

kermit lied - it IS easy being green! :)

ive been reading this wonderful book (that i HIGHLY recommend) by barbara kingsolver called animal vegetable miracle. its about a family that moves from arizona to the appalachians and decides to eat nothing but what they can get locally or grow themselves. its incredibly interesting, with short essays from her children, recipes, and tons of facts about the current food industry in america. which is a lot more appalling than you would think. ill tell ya, reading the first few chapters alone has me wanting to do the same thing. unfortunately, i like living in columbus too much - i am not a farm girl lol.

fortunately for me, thanks to firefox's handy dandy StumbleUpon feature, i just found this amazing website - 66 things you can grow at home without a garden! im surprised at just how many different foods can be grown in containers; before i found this site, i thought you could only grow herbs, and maybe tomatoes if you have one of those topsy turvy things (which i would totally have, were it not for the fact that our balcony gets zero sunlight). but yes, i am super excited about this find, and i plan on eventually having a great deal of this list growing in our little apartment :) i also need to find some good farmers markets in the area, to supplement what i dont end up growing. i also plan to visit my cousins pick-your-own strawberry farm regularly. i want to buy local organic produce (and meat and dairy if available) whenever possible. not only will it be cheaper, but it will taste about a million times better. i mean really, have you ever had a garden-fresh tomato thats still warm from the sun? it is AMAZING. makes those impostors you buy in the produce section of your grocery store seem absolutely flavorless and boring. thank god my dad had a small garden while my siblings and i were growing up. those tomatoes have spoiled me, i wont settle for less than the best now. and the best means local, organic, and fresh.

new apartment! yay!

so i finally got around to taking pictures of the new place :) chances are most of you have already seen these on facebook (or in person), but for those few of you who arent my facebook friends, heres the link: http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2111321&id=50602056&ref=mf
the album is public, so you can all enjoy my adorable new apartment :) lol!

HAPPY WIZARDING INDEPENDENCE DAY!!!

On this day 3 years ago, Harry Potter defeated Voldemort and liberated all of wizarding kind from his evil wrath!

Please celebrate responsibly; dont drink and fly

"We did it, we bashed them, wee Potter’s the one, and Voldy’s gone moldy, so now let’s have fun!"

HAPPY BELTANE!!!

According to an article entitled "The Merry Month of May" on about.com, "The first day of May is still celebrated as a pre-Christian magical rite in some parts of England. Local people dance around a maypole (an ancient fertility symbol), in what was once one of England's most important festivals of the year." May Day and Beltane obviously have much in common, as both celebrate new growth and fertility. Even when May Day celebrations were banned in the late 16th century for being immoral, the customs died hard and it wasn't long before the festivities were once again widespread. But long before the May Day celebrations, with their maypole dancing, garlands and dances became popular, the ancient fire festival of Beltane took place for centuries.

It is not clear where or how the festival of Beltane first came about; Ronald Hutton in The Stations of the Sun mentions the first recorded instance of a bishop in Lincolnshire complaining about local priests who "demeaned themselves by joining games which they call the bringing-in of May" in 1240. May Games were recorded in Scotland in 1432. There is some speculation that Beltane and May Day is related to the ancient Roman festival of Floralia. According to the about.com article, this was "a six-day party in honor of Flora, the goddess of Spring and Flowers, the Floralia was a time of singing, dancing and feasting in the ancient capital." Dressed in bright colors in imitation of spring flowers, citizens would decorate the entire city with fresh blooms. "Hares and goats, symbols of fertility, would be let loose in gardens as protectors of Flora, and great singing and stomping would be heard in order to wake up Spring." Of course, dancing is a large part of May Day celebrations as well. Apparently, Flora was also the patron of prostitutes, and during this festival the Roman "working girls" participated enthusiastically, performing naked in theatres and taking part in gladiatorial events. The themes of fertility and sexuality are obviously still very much associated with Beltane and May Day amongst modern pagans... but let's look more closely at the ancient history of Beltane in the British Isles.

First of all, the origin of the name "Beltane" is disputed. The holiday was also known as "Roodmas" in England and "Walpurgisnacht" in Germany. Alternately spelled Bealtaine, Beltaine, and any number of Gaelic derived-spellings, it is also the Irish word for the month of May, and is said to mean anything from "Bel-fire" Feast of the god Bel" to "bright fire." Janet and Stewart Farrar, in Eight Sabbats for Witches offer an excellent tracing of the holiday's Irish roots, and particularly the European fire-god Belenus whom they believe this festival is named for (a name possible traced back to Baal, the bible's only pagan god, whose name simply means "Lord"). Ronald Hutton states that since the Celtic word "bel" means bright or fortunate, this is adequate to explain the translation as being "lucky fire" or "bright fire."

For FIRE is what this festival is all about. It is one of the two great fire festivals of the wheel of the year (the other is Samhain). It also falls upon the cross-quarter days, which mark the astrological movement of the sun. In ancient times, the calendar days for these holidays would have been roughly seven to eleven days AFTER we now celebrate them (usually on the first of the month). The way to know for sure is to observe when the sun reaches 15 degrees of the zodiac sign. For Beltane, this is Taurus, the Bull (the sun reaches 15 degrees Taurus on May 5th this year). At Lammas, Leo; at Samhain, Scorpio, and at Imbolc, Aquarius.

Samhain and Beltane divide the year into two distinct halves of great importance to agrarian-based societies (as in western Europe, where our Celtic calendar of eight major seasonal festivals originates). In F. Marian McNeill's book The Silver Bough, she states: "At Beltane, flocks and herds went to their summer pastures; as Hallowmass (Samhain) they returned to their winter quarters. Beltane may be regarded as a day of Supplication, when a blessing was invoked on hunter and herdsman, on cattle and crops." Whereas Samhain was a "Day of Thanksgiving, for the safe return of the wanderers and the renewal of the food supply."

Fire festivals in ancient times were seen as times of propitiation and purification. Propitiation, says McNeill, "means sacrifice; to propitiate the mysterious forces of nature and ensure fertility in field and fold and on the hearth."

(from www.witchvox.com, for full article click here)